Would anyone really punch their Golden Ticket to get Willy Wonka’s Chewy Crunts? I mean Chewy Runts. Whatever.

There are certain names that lend themselves to slips. Sometimes this is done intentionally, as with the oft-used album title “Cunning Stunts.” Make a casual switch of a consonant here and there, and voila, you have a word you can’t say on television. Then there are times like this. I see “Chewy Runts” and my brain automatically jumbles it into “Chewy Crunts.” “Crunt” as in “Andy Rooney, may he rest in peace, was a miserable crunt.” I don’t think that’s what they were going for here.

By the by, did the real life Wonka people license Gene Wilder’s image to use in these ads? They probably had the rights stemming from the first movie, but I ask because that’s a reasonable cartoon facsimile of him, and the Willy Wonka that you saw in ads back in the day didn’t always look like that.