Thor vs. The Asgardian Goldfinger vs. Twinkies!

Gudrun, the “Glutton for Gold,” might not be at the forefront of Asgard’s pantheon, but he apparently has an Odin-sized hankering for all things associated with that precious metal — which extends to goldish-hued snack cakes.

The real question here is how the hell Hostess is getting those Twinkies up to Asgard. And who has the concession? Are truckers in 18-wheelers hauling crate upon crate over the Rainbow Bridge? (Paging U.S. 1!) Are godly gastrointestinal tracts the only ones that can safely process the high-fructose corn syrup and saturated fats of your typical Hostess product? The mind boggles.