Shamed by your slow reading?
Consider this an adjunct, codicil, tangent or what have you to the classic “Shamed By Your English?” comic book ad.
I’d submit that the answer to this ad’s “Why Do You Read So Slowly?” query is perhaps quite simple: maybe you’re just dumb. If you’ve checked the prescription on your thick, unwieldy glasses, allowed the blue haze of pipe smoke to clear, and you still have reading problems, then it could be that you’re simply flat out stupid. And that you’ll spend the rest of your days gazing quizzically at the rows of books on your shelves, their spines never cracked.