Considering Wate-On? Let the buxom Quinn O’Hara and a pasty scientist with a beaker allay any doubts.

In the days before heroin chic, heaven forbid you were caught shy a few pounds — ergo the need for assorted powders and calorie bombs to keep your weight up. Even women were a target, before the angular, androgynous runway model would become high fashion’s feminine ideal and the bulimic’s psychological bane. Hence the above advert. We’ve seen DON’T BE SKINNY ads from comics before, but never with a celebrity endorser. Quinn O’Hara, though not quite the household name today that she was in the past — if she even was then — had Wate-On’s back. Hey, she was in a movie with Robert Stack, and A UNITED ARTISTS RELEASE no less. (We’ll ignore that she appeared but was uncredited in said film.) Based on that Wate-On must be both safe and effective, right?

Screw it, we’re just mesmerized by her pointy rack and her fleshy gams — no bamboo shoots for Quinn. I’ll take two boxes of Wate-On! Hell, two pallets of the stuff! Tell the bespectacled lab technician on the right that I’ll take two pallets!

(Poor convalescents. So drained of life, they don’t even get ALL CAPS like the women, men, girls, and boys. As if they’re a diseased sub-species or something.)