The Speedee-Bilt model airplane promises “MANY HAPPY LANDINGS.” In related news, it lies.

This ad promises “Many happy landings and launchings,” but one imagines that the “Speedy-Bilt” model planes were like others of their ilk: flimsy contraptions ready to fall apart at the slightest jolt. Especially when they augur right down into the dirt on their maiden voyage, like all these things do, ruining all the painstaking effort with that tub of Elmer’s Glue.