Hey, a bro/manssiere! For your back!

So suppose you’re a guy, and you buy yourself a Pi Peer(?) Shoulder Brace to improve your sagging posture and general shmooiness. Suppose your “wonderful new feeling of confidence” actually helps you to, against all odds, land a woman. You and her are in the bedroom, you’re taking off each other’s clothes, and she comes to your shoulder brace. This is a Seinfeld scenario if there ever was one — Frank Constanza and Kramer would be proud. At the very least it harkens back to Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute and his “elaborate network of trusses.” I guess what I’m saying is STAND UP STRAIGHT, YOU DOPE. Or never know the touch of a woman.

It’s as if this is some Title IX attempt to leaven the comic-advertised-undergarment gender playing field, what with the vast array of female girdles and all. You know what? Just stick to watching Posture Pals. Forget the man-back-girdle.