Nothing gets a party going like someone whipping out their gahoon

The term “gahoon” sounds like an insult, as in “You filthy, dirty gahoon, get your paws off my wife!” Or maybe it sounds like a little floating alien bedevilling the residents of Bedrock, one that symbolizes the terminal decline of a classic animated sitcom. Pick your poison.

Or it could be a musical instrument. One that looks like’s it’s assembled with colonoscopy equipment and a saxophone mouthpiece. Or hookah gear.

All I know is this: I’ve never seen a symphony with a gahoon section, and the words “1st chair gahoonist” have never been strung together in the history of the world. Stick to your mail-order harmonicas, kids.