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“Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here” Includes Children

February 4, 2012

These “Justice for All Includes Children” PSAs were found in DC Comics around the bicentennial, and the one above I pulled out of the Super-Sons World’s Finest from last week. They remind me a bit of the G.I. Joe post-show “Knowing is half the battle” vignettes that allowed that violent cartoon to air — “Now that we’ve spent a half-hour firing guns at each other with no apparent consequences, HERE’S A WORD A BOUT BIKE SAFETY.” Except these Superman raps lacked the unintentional humor of the Joe stuff (seriously, a Joe would give advice to kids through a bathroom window and we weren’t supposed to be creeped out by that). You can find many of the Justice blurbs on the web, including a selection here on Dial B for Blog.

I love me some Superman words of wisdom, but these were stiff as hell. Plus Curt Swan and Vince Colletta (I think) seem disinterested at best in this short, which purports to convince us that juvenile court ain’t so bad. Yeah, a foster family situation has never gone south fast.

A thousand years ago I toiled on the juvenile docket for a local prosecutor’s office. There were a lot of fine, hard-working people associated with that corner of the justice system, from the judges to the attorneys I worked with to the public defenders, probation officers and detention facility workers. They all tried. But, let me tell you, it wasn’t even the dim ray of sunshine that Kal-El is trying to sell us. You’d go home some days wanting to hang yourself.

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